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Celebrate the Small Wins: A Strategy for Goal Setting

Feel less overwhelmed and more in control by setting achievable goals - build momentum in your new life - reinforce and celebrate your wins.
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Divorce is one of life’s most difficult things, filled with tumultuous emotions, choices and transformations. However, even while everything else seems to be in chaos, establishing and rejoicing in small goals can be a lighthouse that guides you. The idea of focusing on little victories can make this scary trip manageable.

The Power of Small Wins

It’s easy to feel overwhelmed when faced with big changes during a divorce. Here is where the magic lies behind small wins. Essentially, they are achievable goals that can be accomplished within shorter periods. These may not mean much when we consider each individual win but when added together, they create momentum, provide an ego boost, and help keep an optimistic outlook.

Why Small Wins Matter

1. **Achievable Goals:** Small wins break large tasks into manageable parts or chunks that can be completed easily. This makes it easier to start and maintain progress especially when your energy and focus may be all over the place.

2. **Boosts Confidence:** Every little step counts as progress made. Achieving these goals regardless of how inconsequential they appear gives you confidence and re-enforces your belief that you will overcome this trying moment.

3. **Momentum Building:** One success leads to another just like domino effect. Each accomplishment drives you forward to the next creating a positive reinforcement loop that keeps you going.

Setting Goals During Divorce

Going through divorce fundamentally shifts your personal story line. Setting goals during this time is not about practical matters or legal issues; it is finding yourself again and moving forward from there. 

Here’s how set up goal setting during divorce:

 Reflect on Your Values and Desires

To start off think about what means most to you at present? It may be important to review some of your values and desires, as they may have changed. How would you like to live after the divorce? This is what will guide you when setting goals.

Start Small

Think of small realistic goals that are consistent with the larger vision you hold for your life. This could be “straighten one desk drawer each day” or “meet a friend for coffee every week to talk about how things are going”. These goals should be specific, measurable and time-bound.

In a famous commencement address, Naval Adm. William McRaven stressed the importance of starting each day with small things:

If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will give you a small sense of pride, and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter. If you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right.

And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made — that you made — and a made bed gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.

If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed.

Celebrate Each Achievement

Take time to recognize and cheer about every goal that has been achieved. It can be an affirmation, a small treat or sharing the good news with friends. Celebrating reinforces the positive impact of your efforts.

The Role of a Divorce Coach in Goal Setting

Navigating divorce is difficult without support from a divorce coach. They encourage, advise and keep one focused on achievable objectives during this period.

How a Divorce Coach Can Help

1. **Clarity and Focus:** A divorce coach assists in clarifying what you want out of this situation while still maintaining focus even when it becomes emotionally charged.

2. **Strategic Planning:** Among others they help break down the bigger picture into more strategic and doable objectives such that it does not seem so huge anymore.

3. **Accountability:** Having someone to answer to will greatly increase your motivation and commitment towards achieving these objectives. A divorce coach offers this accountability by gently nudging you back onto the right path if you derail at some point in the course of this journey

4. **Emotional Support:** Beyond the practical aspects of goal setting, a divorce coach offers emotional support, comprehends the up and down emotions that are associated with divorce.

Finding the Right Divorce Coach

To find the correct divorce coach, look for someone who has experience in dealing with such type of issues. They need to be someone you can feel comfortable sharing your problems with as they should offer empathy as well as guidance. Do not hesitate to interview several coaches until you meet one who suits your needs better.

In Conclusion

However difficult it might be, a separation is also an opportunity to change for better. To help ease this process and come out stronger on the other side, concentrate on minor successes and engage a divorce coach for help. Note that every small triumph counts towards starting a new chapter in your life; commemorate such accomplishments and let them propel you towards self actualization in years to come.

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