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Suffocating in Marriage

Understanding the Tight Grip and Finding Your Breath
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We’ve all experienced it at one point in our lives, that feeling of an elephant on your chest, and it’s no different in marriage. This intense emotional state leaves you feeling alone and trapped.  It’s the heartbreaking realization that your marriage, which should have been a haven of comfort and companionship has turned into an oppressive force slowing your growth, happiness and maybe even yourself. This means if you are reading this article then it is highly likely you are looking for answers and possibly a way out. Let us delve into why one might feel this way, explore the suffocation theory of marriage, recognize signs of an unhappy marriage or unhappy marriages , understand its stages of disintegration as well as finally discuss whether it would be better to divorce or remain unhappily married.

Why Do I Feel Suffocated in Marriage?

There may be many reasons for feeling suffocated in a marriage varying from one couple to another depending on their unique characteristics and relationship dynamics. Therefore, analyzing these justifications further will help identify the root causes so that you can breathe again. Here is why you may be experiencing suffocation in your relationship:

Loss of Individuality

One frequently reported cause for such feelings is loss of individuality. In essence, marriage is about combining two persons who lead separate lives but both having their own sense of identity during such union. The fact that interests become those only belonging to spouse leading to disinterest on one’s hobbies or social life towards partner preference change leaving them with nothing like themselves anymore has left some people confused on what they really became after losing themselves including both their personality development and growth associated with marital status depression.

Overbearing Expectations

The modern narrative surrounding matrimony comes with great expectations. There is often an unspoken understanding that your partner must be your best friend, lover, confidant and sometimes even a therapist. Though having high standards is not inherently wrong, this can become suffocating when they are impractical or unmet. This pressure to meet these aspirations creates feelings of dissatisfaction and animosity that worsen the feeling of entrapment.

Control and Dependency Issues

A suffocating marriage may also result from issues such as control or dependency problems. When one spouse controls the other in terms of decision making, friendships, finances or even daily routines it might make them feel trapped. Similarly, dependence whether it is emotional or financial may also leave you suffocated. This limits one’s freedom and independence hence turning marriage into more like a prison than partnership.

Unresolved Conflicts

Inadequately resolved disagreements are also a key factor that leaves one feeling suffocated. When we choose to sweep them under the carpet instead of addressing them, they do not go away but rather simmer and create tension. The marriage develops into a pressure cooker due to this ongoing tension as there appears no way out of the cycle of unresolved issues and their negative emotions.

Varying In Growth

People change and grow over time; it is just a natural process of life. Though when people grow at different rates or even towards different directions then this can result in a rift between partners. If you think your partner is not growing at the same pace as you—or vice versa—it can bring about disconnection within the union. This kind of disequilibrium in advancement can make someone feel restrained as if matrimony is blocking his or her full potential.

It is important to identify exactly why your marriage makes you feel smothered if you want to deal with it effectively. Taking action may include talking openly with your spouse, individual therapy for yourself or perhaps couples counseling. Also remember that suffocation does not have to mean that your marriage will end up in divorce eventually. You might be able to restore a relationship that is both supportive and liberating by making efforts, discussing or even consulting experts.

What Is Suffocation Theory?

In an article published by the Association for Psychological Science, experts  found that today’s marriages are subjected to enormous societal expectations and emotional satisfaction levels in what is referenced as suffocation theory. This approach suggests that while aspirations from marriages have skyrocketed, spouses haven’t actually given more time or emotional energy toward them resulting into feelings of suffocations. We almost seem like we require our marriages resuscitating everything in us without enough space allowed so that it can thrive by itself.

Signs Of An Unhappy Marriage

Realizing signs of an unhappy marriage could be difficult especially when you are right in the middle of it all. They include constant fighting or no communication at all, absence of intimacy, feeling unappreciated or disrespected by your partner, daydreaming about being single again and having a different life from your spouse and finally, great variations in personal values as well as future aspirations. Accepting these signs is often painful but it helps us to decide upon the necessary steps.

Marital Breakdown Stages

Breakdown of marriage does not occur in an instance. It usually follows a certain pattern that starts with discontentment leading to more conflict or even disengagement. The stages may include:

1. Disillusionment: Realizing that your marriage is not what you had imagined

2. Erosion: Slow disintegration of communication and affection between partners.

3. Detachment: When one emotionally detaches themselves from their spouse, often leading to physical separations as well.

4. Physical Separation: Living apart which could result in seeking for alternative solutions outside the marriage.

5. Legal Action: This is the end of the road involving lawyers particularly possible divorce.

Is It Better To Divorce Or Stay Unhappily Married?

There are long-term emotional effects staying in an unhappy marriage that can damage not just the partners but also children involved. On the other hand, divorce provides a stage for liberation and self-searching although it comes with its own baggage such as emotional distress and financial consequences.

It is important to get professional advice before making any decisions. A free consultation for divorce coaching can give you insight into what your next move might be, thereby empowering you to make an informed choice. A divorce coach assists individuals during this complicated period helping them navigate through it by providing assistance and strategies. Also, an online life coach may help you rebuild after divorce by focusing on personal growth and fresh starts.

Feeling smothered in a marriage means that there is something vital that is not working well. This disconnect results in feelings of depression and spiraling.  Whether from unmet expectation or lack of communication or simply growing apart as couples; recognizing the problem is the first step towards resolving it. Understanding stages and signs of marriage breakdown and identifying unhappiness symptoms will guide future decisions from now until then on where to go next. Finally, deciding either to remain or leave your marital status remains personal choice but remember there are resources available should take you through this journey safely.

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